honeyj's photos

Where are we, Herr Doktor? Good question, my boy. In fact, the only question. Meaning what? Meaning, take your pick of where you want to be. Huh? You see those portals, stretching into infinity? They're portals? Ok. It's my latest invention! Each one opens into a different version of the universe! Cool! And different version of you. You mean. . . Exactly. They're doors to the multiverse. An infinite number of doors! And you are going to be the first to visit! M-m-me? But but how do I know which one to go through? You don't. And once you're in, you're gone from this world. Forever? I promise to try and bring you back. Eventually. But Doktor! I like the life I've got! Oh tut tut! Now, off you go! I'll take a picture of you just before you disappear. Science!

Are you here for the celebration? Uh, sure! Celebrating what? Go check out the inside that structure over there. You'l see. What is that? Go on! You'll see! Ok.But, um, why are you carrying a torch and can of gasoline? Oh these? Ha ha! Yeah. For the bonfire later. No biggie. I see. Just go on in there! You'll love it! Actually, I'll pass. But why? You know what? I've seen this movie before.

Dude. That book you're reading. What about it? The author's been blacklisted by the Committee on Morality and State Security. I hear he's been disappeared. No way. I like the way he writes. Well, don't like it too much, if you know what I mean. What, is somebody gonna check up on me? You never know. Might've already happened. Damn. I thought this was a free country. Where'd you get that silly idea? Must have been implanted. Now you're making sense. Really? That is so damn depressing. True.

Stanley darling, be a dear and have the concierge bring up a bottle of champagne. Of course, Edna. Would you like caviar with it? No, just chips, thanks. Chips? Stanley, you know caviar is not in season. How silly of me. Really, dear. Try and pay attention.

Good morning, Herr Doktor. My boy, I know just what the world needs most. More sex toys? What? No! We need a new history! The one we've got is completely inadequate. We're stuck with it, because it can't be changed. Until now and my new history eraser machine, that is. Ha ha! But Doktor, don't governments try and change history all the time? Precisely! It's called propaganda! All lies! But now I will be able to actually change history! However and whenever I want! Can you make it so someone was never born? Let's see! Sit here. I'll attach these tiny electrodes, like thus. And then what, Doktor? And then, I push this, and. . . bye bye. B. . . Mein Gott! It actually worked! He's gone! And I forgot to ask if he brought me a sandwich. Oh well. Science!

What's up, Egon? Oh hi Lars. I just got home. Where were you? Same old place. Your favorite abandoned car plant? I love it there. Busted by security again, of course. Really? What'd they say this time? The usual stuff. "Hey buddy! You can't be in here!" Etc. No shit. You say something back? What do you think? Need a hint? No, pretty sure I got it.

Excuse me. What time does the next train get here? You're waiting for a train? Well yes. The express stops here, right? You see this pile of collapsing rusty steel over here? I do. What do you think that is? Uh, the station? Wait. Are you an SL guy? Yeah! Shit. So I somehow got dropped into the matrix. I assume that means this isn’t really air we're breathing? Correct. Got it. Ok. Here's what you do: go round to the other side of this heap of rotting debris. Is that where the train stops? No, but I'm hoping it'll let me escape your fucking fantasy world.

Hey Mel, are you coming to church today? I would, Jerry, but the service was kinda weird last week. What do you mean, weird? Man, it was like they were speaking another language. Oh, yeah, it gets like that sometimes. Cool, right? Not really. I felt like I was trapped in a room with a bunch of aliens. Yeah? Maybe you were. What? But don't tell anybody. If you do, we'll know. That's kinda scary, dude. I'm just saying, be careful, if you receive my meaning. My antennae are picking you up loud and clear. You have antennae too? No! Do you? Of course, but I don't brag about it. Probably a good idea.

May I help you? Yeah, I hear there's a party going on. Can I come in? I'm sorry, this a members-only establishment. Are you a member? Uh, no. What do I gotta do to join. Well, first of all, are you familiar with SPS? Is that the club name? So it's like, Selective Persecution Society? Er, no. Sick Punchline School? Not even close. Damn. Yes. Too bad. Can't I just get a temporary visitor's pass? Ha ha! Good one. No. So wait! What's SPS? See the ampersand on your way out. Goodbye. *Sensory Processing Sensitivity

Here? No man. There. Where? There. Deep down there. How deep? Very deep. What makes it home? I dunno. It's just a feeling. Don't you ever get a feeling? Well, yeah. But not the one you're feeling. Too bad. It's definitely in the top 10.

Tower, am I cleared for take-off? Leon, who are you talking to? Quiet Jules! I'm radioing the tower! Leon. You are not piloting an airplane. You don't have a radio, and this is a factory roof; not an airport. Whaddya mean? Of course it is! I've got my leather flight suit on; goggles; silk scarf. The full get-up! And your bicycle is ridiculously overloaded with that stuff. Hush! Uh, tower? Please repeat that runway designation, out. Leon. . . Roger that, tower! I'm running through my pre-flight checklist now. All systems are a go. I repeat, all systems go, out. Leon, I left my sandwich in the car. I'm gonna go eat it. See you later. Wait! You brought a sandwich? Can I have some? Hit me up on your return. Have a nice flight. Just. . . Roger that, tower! Taxiing to runway 09-3! Gotta go, Jules. Right. Watch out for the end of the runway. How come? Three floors straight down is how come.

I could live here. You think? I do. I really could live here. Well I hate to break it to you, pal, but this is my place. I live here. I don't know you from Adam and you're trespassing. I see. Good. So get the hell off my property. Can't I at least watch the end of the sunset? You got 20 bucks? Uh, no. Beat it.

Is it safe? Maybe not. I'm ok with that. Me too

You mean he did? Are you sure? Totally. Amadeo Modigliani? The early 20th Century École de Paris painter? Not to be confused with his contemporary, Gustav Klimt (which I never do of course). What? No! Calvin Modigliani! The semi-literate 4 pack-a-day auto worker and part-time scrapper. Oh. Calvin's work is very good. You think they're related? Somehow I doubt it.

Hey, Captain, you got a minute? What's happening, Detective? It's my lineup. What about it. You got the suspect in there, right? Yeah. but the victim's having a problem. She can't ID the guy? Not that. She says they all did it. What? Is this the one claimed to have been abducted by a space alien? That's her. She says we got the whole goddamn flying saucer crew in here. Jesus. How the hell did we do that? Good question. All I did was round up the usual suspects. This town can't be full of alien deadbeats, can it? I'm beginning to wonder. But anyway, the vic now says she wants to go with them. Where? Like I know? Wherever flying saucers go. Mars, or whatever. Unbelievable. I say let her. Really? What about our suspect? Does he have anything to say? Just shit like, 'Take me to your leader.' Makes no sense to me. We had to tie him down, cuz he's got, like, wings or something. I've heard enough. Cut him loose. Cut 'em all loose. Really? I got too many headaches to be worrying about alien abductions and boozed up ETs sleeping in doorways. What about my report? What are you gonna say? We arrested a Martian? Chief will have our ass and we'll be laughed out of town! Let 'em all fly off then? Who cares?! We'll pretend this never happened. What never happened? Ha ha! Exactly.

Marty, I just found our location shoot for the next film Yeah? Does it have what we need? It's got it all: it's quiet, well-built, and has a cool history. What about things like electricity, heat and water? Ok, now you're getting a little unrealistic. Will the stars like it? Probably not. But did I mention that we can have it basically for free? Yeah? Screw those ego hounds! Action!

Welcome to the opening of our new art space! Thanks. I see a lot of space, but where's the art? What do you think is hanging on the walls? Good question. I don't see any walls either. Ha ha! I totally forgot I was supposed to do that today. Looks like you forgot the complimentary food and drink too. True. My memory is non-existent. Just like your walls, eh? You could say that.

Stanley, where are we? And what is that awful noise? It's driving me crazy! There's no noise, Edna. It's all in your head. Oh man, it hurts. What did I have to drink last night? What didn't you drink? They ran out of booze. You're kidding! Oh my god. Yeah, and guess what? We went to the wrong party. We what? Look around. You recognize this place? Well, no, but. . . shit! Where are we? Hey, don't worry. Nothing was caught on film. You sure? Positive. And a good thing for you, too, you little minx. Why do you say that? Your smile stopped traffic. So? That's all you were wearing at the time.