honeyj's photos


  • Erehwon

    how much farther? I think we're close to civilization. I wouldn't be too sure. why not? that sign we just passed gave me no reason for optimism. erehwon? that's not even a word! I know, right?

  • Ministry of Truth

    may I help you? yes, I received this subpoena to appear. very well, take a seat. your name will be called. a seat? there's no chairs. are you trying to cause trouble? me? not at all. I'm just pointing out a fact. fact? what fact? that there's no chairs. i…

  • retirement plan

    hey, phil! I heard you retired. enjoy your leisure years! thanks, ed. I've got an excellent plan, now that I won't have a paycheck coming in. planning is everything, they say. yes sir. sold everything. found a nice little place to live. cool. like a condo…


  • prototype

    hey, claude. how's it going? jerry, I've just been reading some of these new government policies. me too. pretty strange, eh? you think they gave any thought to these things before rolling them out? nah, man. they're prototypes. what? they're not meant t…

  • periodic table table

    good evening, herr doktor. how are you? hello, my boy. come see what I've made. I've been working on this periodic table for days now, and it's just about finished. you mean you've discovered a new element? doktor, that's awesome! well, no. but I've found…

  • man about town

    nice painting. you do that? yeah. that's me. you a boxer then? nah. but I just broke up with my girlfriend. so this is. . . metaphorical, I take it? you can take it that way if you want. how do you take it? I take it like I just got the shit beat out of m…


  • alternative facts

    when is he due in? any time now. on a big cargo ship. he'll be be suspicious. he don't know us. so? so what are we gonna tell him? we just give him the facts, is all. you think that's a good idea? we'll give him the alternative facts. you mean, we just ma…

  • Russian asset

    hey, Claude, I hear you got a new government job. yeah, it's great! I get to meet all kinds of interesting and smart people. yeah? like who? like all kinds. I met Putin the other day. yeah? isn't he a total thug, killer and creep? no way! he was really co…

  • last exit to nowhere

    this is your stop. time to get out. what? here? it's the middle of nowhere for chrissake. makes it the perfect spot. I suggest you start walking. why? what are you gonna do? well, I'm gonna start counting. yeah? and then? when I get to 20, I'm gonna start…


  • blind chance

    boss, that posse is closin' in fast. you got a plan? I do: we keep riding through this arroyo. come out the other side, we'll be long gone afore they figure out where we went. good idea, boss, except for one problem. yeah? what's that? this here's a blind…

  • executive action

    smithers, it's come to my attention that your orders have gone up by over 50%. yes sir. very good. I'm rewarding you with an executive window office. really, sir? gee, that's swell. you've earned it. just one thing, sir: will there be actual glass in t…

  • fat man

    what's its name? they call it 'fat man.' weird name. what does it do? rules my world. lucky guy.


  • guy

    you ever seen this guy before? no. you? I dunno. he looks awfully familiar though. maybe you saw him in a past life. could be. but which one? does it matter? all of them were probably better than this. yeah, I'm not exactly progressing up the food chain.…

  • virtual reality

    what's this place, donny? it's the beta version of my next project. yeah? what's that? draining the swamp. oh? it don't look drained to me. it's not. that's just what I call it. that's your plan? keep the swamp but call it drained? exactly.I call it drain…

  • double occupancy

    you sure this is the hotel? totally. it's right here on my GPS. but where's the valet? we have to carry our own bags? aw, quit your whining. he's probably on a coffee break. I hope we get a nice room. one with a view. from the look of it, I'd say most roo…


  • harmonic reduction

    may I help you? yeah, is jimmy home? no he ain't. whaddya want? I'd like to borrow one of his records. you and everybody else in this neighborhood. can't you see he's using them? c'mon, please? which one you want? it's up near the roof. that figures.

  • genetic engineering

    isn't this a perfect spot, edna? it is, stanley. except. . . except what? well, except for your brother. my brother? just look at him! it's embarrassing! oh come now. he can't help being that way. but you're not like that! I guess I got my mother's genes.…

  • cult of personality

    geez, I can't keep my eyes off him. yeah, pretty creepy, ain't he? quiet! he'll hear you! no way! and you know what'll happen next. what? he'll tweet your ass to death. c'mon. he's all-powerful. he doesn't have time for that kind of childish nonsense. I k…


1221 items in total