Thaumatology

Am I in the right church?
All are welcome here, brother.
That's good. I need to pray to my patron saint.
Which one is that?
Oh, St. Debtfree.
I don't believe I've heard of that one.
Yes, he's the patron saint of deadbeats.
Aren't you referring to St. Bernardine of Siena?
Well I tried him. He told me I was worthless.
Oh, I'm sure he didn't.
Yeah, he loaned me 50 bucks. I welched.
So now you want to pray to St Debtfree?
Yeah, to get Bernardine off my back. That guy doesn't quit.
So now. . .
Now I need a miracle.