B/W and monochrome

edna, darling. there's something I need to tell you. what's that, stanley? well, edna. it's 20 years now, we've been together. yes, stanley. a wonderful 20 years. but I have to tell you. it's time for me to leave. what!? what do you mean? I mean, I've been recalled. what? there's a new model, and I'm replaced. a new. . . you'll like the new one. he's much better. new one? yes, the next android, model 51. but. . . you're. . . human! I mean. . . no, actually I'm not. but then, neither are you. what? of course I am! I told them, either I get a new model, or I'm gone. but how. . . so, model 51 has been shipped. and I'm out of here. but. . . they told me I'll get the update of you, edna v.78. what version am I? oh, you're a 72 or something. can't even get parts. parts? why didn't I know this? no self-awareness in the 72. sucks, doesn't it. so you're trading me in. I can't believe it. yep. for a younger model. men! you're all alike. well, we call ourselves drabhoovies on arcturus. and you call women. . .? oh. bitches. same as here. shoulda known.

base: this is advance scout 5. go ahead 5. what's out there? nothing, base. absolutely nothing. explain, 5. I mean it's all gone, base. disappeared. evaporated. what's gone? everything! the world! it's been erased. so the experiment. . . let's just say that it worked. way beyond expectations. well, that's good news, right? sure, I guess. but there's nobody on earth left to tell. yeah, that's a bummer, I suppose. yeah. so. . . now what? now? I dunno. how about let's eat! ok! I'm there!

good evening, lord. hello, archangel. what's new? I can tell what's not new, lord. oh? what's that? urban renewal. humans and their cities. yes, they seem to have lost something there. sadly, it saps them of their vitality, lord. well, what about their ingenuity? I gave it to them. yes, but they can be somewhat short-sighted, lord. are you saying I made a mistake, archangel? no lord. however, they use their gifts. . . unwisely at times. yes, well, that's why I have to keep on tinkering. of course, lord. if humans want to destroy what they've built, so be it. they are your creations, though. yes, but I've learned. look at betelgeuse4. yes, a masterpiece of engineering, lord. their stuff won't fall apart, that's for sure. well, it's all made of anti-matter, lord. totally eco-friendly too. a nice touch, eh? indeed, lord. you scored big time with that one. maybe a little anti-matter wouldn't hurt on earth. that would wipe out all life there, lord. oh. it would? pity. more importantly, though, when's our vacation? next week, lord. your favorite lake again. glad to hear it's still there. and the sand toys? all packed, lord. ok, good. let's do it.

the sun feels good. looks good, too. on you, I mean.

I suggest you don't get any closer. why? it's a bunch of rocks. you go over there, you're not coming back. what're you talking about, man? it all started here. it's like a black hole. say what? I'm just telling you. be warned. don't go there. put down the crack pipe, dude. be real. I'll inform your friends. maybe they'll miss you. hey, I'm not going anywhere. say hello to ralph. you'll be joining him. I don't know any ralph. you will.

where are we going, sheriff? this ain't the way to the jail. shut up, prisoner. but where are you taking me? you can get out here. but we're in the middle of the woods. you shouldn't have beat that girl. what? what do you mean? you got 10 seconds to start running. what? then what are you going to do? start shooting. you can't do that! I'm your prisoner! that was the last girl you're ever going to beat. you can't be serious! you're using up your time. I can't believe this! time's almost up. you'll pay! you'll pay for this! not like you're about to.

what's this thing, stanley? it's an old machine of some kind, edna. the mines here closed down years ago. once they closed, there was no work. the grocery and feed store followed. then the movie theater shut down. then the diner. there wasn't no business, left, so the people moved away. dogs too. that's a sad story, stanley. it is. I can't wait to get to our beach house on barbados. to help you get over the sadness here? but I absolutely must go shopping first. I have no clothes at all. it's a real problem, isn't it? oh yes.

hear them, comrade? yes. they've let the dogs out. they're tracking us. we better find the frontier soon, or we're done for. good thing I brought my compass, eh? how did you get one of those? at the american store. it came in a breakfast cereal box. what is a compass doing in a box of cereal? those americans. they must really think ahead. you could have fooled me. yeah, who knew?

how are things today, lord? very well, archangel. how about you? they say that the earth is warming, lord. warming? how so? hydrocarbon emissions, greenhouse gases. oh yes, I remember. I engineered all that. you did? from the start? sure. as a safety valve. just in case. in case what, lord? in case humans outsmarted themselves on my earth. you mean. . . pride, archangel. what does it go before? the fall, lord? you got it. and they're going to fall hard. is there no hope for them? sure, but they'll have to save themselves. can't we help? I promised the cockroaches they could have it. you did? if humans screw up, it's bug city. but you already created the arcturans, lord. don't tell them. they'll get their feelers in a bunch. not pretty when that happens. unless you're a bug, of course. of course, lord.

ok you apes! ejection pods 1 through 12, load up! where we going, sarge? who cares? they're all the same. this one's called earth. what's the enemy like? beats me. hideous monsters, probably. be ready. 1 to 12 are locked and loaded, sarge. eject! listen up! this is kill or be killed. be alert out there! the ship will orbit 3 days. earth better be ours by then. I advise you to set your weapons to kill! these humans are as huge as they are ugly! see you in 3 days, sarge. in one piece, I hope, private. good thing our tentacles grow back, eh? a definite advantage. ok pods 13-24! eject!

I got a job for you vinnie. yeah? what's that boss? you know the old guy runs the pawnshop? yeah, sure. been going there for years. guy owes us money. I'm tired of waiting. what you want I should do about it? go break his nose if he don't pay. ok, boss. but I don't think he's gonna notice. he aint that tough. I'm just tellin' ya. he ain't gonna notice.

does the bus stop here? I'm sure it does. ok, I'll wait. hoping you'd say that.

hey, buddy. got any spare change? you're panhandling in the woods? just following the money. but wouldn't you do better in the city? yeah, but I'm a nature lover. yes, so am I. and I really love nature when I've got a few bucks.

it's all right in front of you. I wouldn't change that for anything.

so he's in there? for sure? it's still daylight, isn't it? he's in there. and we're gonna just go in there and get him? not us. you. I'll be out here, waiting. now hold on. you want me to go in there. all alone. you got it. and I'm supposed to get Vlad the Impaler. by myself. I know you can do it. exactly how, did you say? I forget. you use this little item on him. shit! that's just a cross! that won't do anything! he'll shrink in fear, trust me. how can you possibly know that? I saw it in a movie once. a movie? are you serious? it was very realistic. but what if it doesn't work? then you get to see what being impaled feels like. fuck it. gimme that bad boy. I'm gonna rock the house. go get him, champ. at least have a latte waiting for me when I get out. absolutely. and one for Vlad too. you never know. good idea. I wonder if he takes sugar.

wind is picking up. I feel it. we're gonna get it tonight, looks like. yeah. but one thing I'm wondering. what's that? what are we doing up here, anyway? whaddya mean? wasn't it your idea? me? hell no. I hate heights. well it wasn't mine. I hate heights too. then can we go down now? absolutely. soon as you figure out how.

lord, may I interrupt? yes, archangel, what is it? we received a card from ba'al, lord. a card? as in a greeting card? yes, lord. I didn't even know we had mail delivery here. yes. strange. well, what does it say? he wants to know if you're happy with the car. what car? you know, the used mercury you bought from him a while ago. I only did that to get him off my back! yes, well it's called customer relations, lord. ba'al, the former feared god of the canaanites, now worries about customers? that's what used car salesmen do, lord. I suppose. shall I respond? god, no. toss it. isn't that somewhat rude, lord? the customer is always right, archangel. is that really so, lord? it is when I'm the customer. that's hard to argue, lord. thought you'd agree.

where you headed? west. got room for a passenger? where you goin'? anyplace but here. sounds close enough. hop in.