Rules of the Road, by the Farmers' Anti-Automobile Society

Dr. John Birkmire Lawrence (1890-1961), a chiropodist (or podiatrist) in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, promoted his services by adding his name to this amusing list of Rules of the Road.

It's difficult to determine when Lawrence may have first circulated these rules. Versions of it were already appearing in published sources as early as the first decade of the twentieth century (see, for instance, "Constable Trust in Darkest Michigan," The Auto Era, Sept. 1908, p. 11). According to "Dr. Lawrence Moves to 23 S. Third St.," an article that appeared in the Harrisburg Sunday Courier, on February 3, 1935, p. 5, the doctor's office was located at 204 Market Street from 1915 until 1924, so presumably he had them printed sometime during those years.

For another example of early automobile humor, see Not Exceeding the Speed Limit in 1908.

Rules of the Road
Adoped by the Farmers' Anti-Automobile Society

1. Upon Discovering an Approaching Team, the automobilist must stop offside and cover his machine with a blanket painted to correspond to the scenery.

2. The Speed Limit on Country Roads This Year Will Be a Secret, and the penalty for violation will be $10 for every mile an offender is caught going in excess of it.

3 In Case an Automobile Makes a Team Run Away, the penalty will be $50 for the first mile, $100 for the second, $200 for the third, etc., that the team runs; in addition to the usual damages.

4 On Approaching a Corner, where he cannot command a view of the road ahead, the automobilist must stop not less than 100 yards from the turn, toot his horn, ring a bell, fire a revolver, halloo, and send up three bombs at intervals of five minutes.

5 Automobiles Must Again Be Seasonably Painted, that is, so they will merge with the pastoral ensemble and not be startling. They must be green in spring, golden in summer, red in autumn, and white in winter.

6 Automobiles Running on the Country Roads at Night must send up a red rocket Every Mile and Wait Ten Minutes for the road to clear. They may then proceed carefully, blowing their horns and shooting Roman candles.

7. All Members of the Society will give up Sunday to chasing automobiles, shooting and shouting at them, making arrests, and otherwise discouraging country touring on that day.

8. In Case a Horse Will Not Pass an Automobile, the automobilist will take the machine apart as rapidly as possible and conceal the parts in the grass.

9. In Case an Automobile Approach[es] a Farmer's House When the Roads Are Dusty, it will slow down to one mile an hour and the chauffeur will lay the dust in front of the house with a hand sprinkler worked over the dashboard.

Compliments of Dr. J. B. Lawrence, chiropodist, 204 Market Street, Harrisburg, Pa.

Logo at top: "Harrisburg Rotary Club."