Sunday, I went and sat with Dad for a few hours. He was resting peacefully, and I was assured that he wasn’t in pain due to all the meds and morphine. He didn’t wake the whole time I was there and though I was holding his hand, I don’t think he knew I was there. I then went and sat with Mum for over an hour. She was very bright, actually eating some lamb dinner, and was very chatty though confused about what I was saying some of the time.

We need to go in some time soon to discuss her situation with the specialist and a social worker. Some days she looks like she may go home, other days she looks so frail and poorly. She isn’t medically fit to be discharged and seems to be up and down. I’d been home about 10 minutes when the hospital phoned to say Dad had passed away, peacefully and did I want to see him. I don’t want to see him now, but it’s nice that they ask. I’ve never seen a dead body, and honestly, I’d lose it. I’d rather grieve in the privacy of my home, alone. There’s been enough tears in front of nurses…

I’d made a chicken casserole, and it’s in the oven but I don’t know that I’ll eat it today. I can’t remember when I last had a cooked meal though think it may have been Thursday. I’ll see how I feel; the past few days I haven’t eaten much of anything.

Thank you so much for all the kind wishes, and private messages; it’s really appreciated.