timet | ofall 

one year over, since i made my last fall shot and two years since i made my first. it is amazing what happened in between and what i learned. can't say that time was running, would rather say, i was living the moments very well and have nothing to regret. wonder if things happen as i wished for. everything is moving at the moment and it feels great to have that kind of flow back.

this is the view out of my wonderful window, where i'm able to watch akiko. he is sitting there every evening at the same time breathing and smelling the fresh air. still looking for an alternative heating system and somebody, who is helping me for my bathroom, but it will come, i can feel it.

[I.]


[II.]


keisha inspired me to combine leaves and selfs, cause she is doing it in a very beautiful way.

i love the way those leaves make on my face, looking like tears running down on my face, not starting on my eyes, more in my head, my brain.

this picture shows, what i experienced in the last weeks, tears are not coming from our eyes :DDDD their original source are our thoughts, our feelings of course too, but the most made by our thoughts, they are not truely exist. how can i say? if i imagine a situation and i feel like i want to be really into it, i can make my body feel, means my head controls the feeling, so it's not a true feeling then? we are not supposed to cry, we are not supposed to hurt? when we experience, that the pain isn't actually the same we relate it to a former situation, doesn't it hurt so much anymore? actually i don't know, it was just a thought and it is so true. we make the most pain by ourself, by our head, we're just running around in circles as long as we find the answer, get hit by a enlightning moment, reaching the next level. if we once learn we can control our thoughts and the situations we are into, then we won't might hurt, cause we learned from and hopefully never do it a second time again. not sure about and i should write more in a i-form, cause these are my thoughts and my experience, doesn't mean anybody else does experience the same. the fact is: pain will always be, something we can grow on, but if we pay attention the the small feelings inside of us, our intuition, the lovely ones, we won't hurt, cause then we are able to react, to change. so it starts with controlling our thoughts, to give strength to our selfconfidence, keep us in a happy mood and able to be in our center, to be close to our feelings?