my faves

I don't want to be here. nobody wants to be here. they have to be here. why is that? god only knows. well, I'm not gonna ask him. I don't think you'd like his answer anyway.

how do you like your new ride, boss? sweet, ain't it? paulie, I said get me something inconspicuous. did you hear me say that? in-con-spic-u-ous. don't you know what that means? sure I do, boss. it means 'big, red and flashy,' right? just like everything else you own. I'll take that as a compliment, paulie. sure boss. you do that.

comfy? yes, very. me too. I thought so.

that's where we gotta go. I don't see it. where is it? it's out there. and we gotta go now. just you and me? well, there ain't nobody else here, is there? yeah, but why us? it looks far. it'll be a snap, you'll see. just don't get too near the edge. what? why not? big fish out there. real big. bite your head off if you let 'em. no way! especially a tasty morsel like yourself. hey, I ain't so tasty, ok? you know it, and I know it. but those monsters out there? they don't know it.

lord, are you busy? well, archangel, I'm trying to relax on the beach. yes, lord. I just wondered if you need anything. hmm. how about a nice corned beef sandwich, on rye? certainly, lord. with a dill pickle, please. of course. man, I love dilll pickles. old dills. know what I mean? I do, lord. and bring me those sand toys, too. yes, lord. I've got some serious building work to do. have fun, lord. I do love this lake.

tan lines on cool sheets. what could be better? a long island iced tea, maybe? coming right up.

hey man, you seen a bunny come by here? sure haven't. don't see too many bunnies in this place. this one's special. would have to be, to wanna hang around here. he thinks for himself. it's how he was raised. by you? no way. he taught me everything I know. I guess he is special, then. totally. so, ah, you got any, ah, lettuce? lettuce? nah. afraid I'm all out. not even a nibble? it's been so long. sorry. bummer.

hey, buddy. can you spare a buck? I can't believe it. you're panhandling on the beach? well, I can't swim, so I gotta stop here. but we're trying to enjoy this sunset. yeah, me too. and I'd enjoy it alot more for a buck.

ok, there's the signal. commence the assault. what signal? I don't see any signal. well I see it, and that's all that matters. oh, I get it. this is all about you, right? I'll pretend I didn't hear that, soldier. whatever.

have we met before? I don't recall being introduced. oh hell, got a cigarette? I'm out of smokes. I can see that this day is going to be weird. is that an issue? not with me it isn't.

watch our backs. there's nobody here, man. they're here, all right. I can feel it. what if they catch us? too horrible to consider. they're that bad? hey, they're not human, remember? where do they come from? don't know. but their tentacles give me the creeps.

got a light? thought you'd never ask. what, are you shy? not around you, I'm not.

we've gotta get him out of there. yeah, but how? the place is a fortress. he's been in there so long, they could have done anything to him by now. it's a monument to man's inhumanity to man. no shit. but they make the best chocolate pies. he did ask for overtime you know. says he needs the money. but he's our 4th for bridge! yeah, it sucks, totally.

ok dog, I followed you out here. now what? hey man, you're supposed to be the smart one. you tell me. are there any birds around here? I don't know! I'm a tourist here, just like you. just great. is it my turn to play with the boom stick? grow some fingers, first. I'm trying!

what's up man? I'm reading. yeah? who? Wallace Stevens. 'let us build the building of light' he didn't write that. of course he did. nah. I think it sounds more like prince. you would.

scout team one calling base. I read you, scout team. what is it? we have a problem. we're stuck on this planet, and don't know how to get off. what do you mean? just beam up like usual. yeah, well, we'd love to, but we sort of lost our device. whaddya mean, you sort of lost it? well, you see, they have these things here called cell phones? so? yeah, well we accidentally picked up one of those, and left our device on a park bench. dammit carl! tell me about it. when we went back to get it, it was gone. so now, some human is walking around trying to make a call with an Arcturan particle beam disintegrater. jesus h. christ! he's liable to obliterate an entire building! yeah, but we've noticed that they seem to tear down everything worthwhile on this miserable excuse for a planet. so then, maybe no one will notice. that's what we're kinda hoping.

stanley, there's something up there. nonsense, edna. it's just a bridge. I know I saw something stanley. hey, what was that noise? stanley! LOOK OUT! OH MY GOD!!!! WHAT IS THAT THING?! stanley! I want to go home! now! just as soon as I get loose from these tentacles, dear.

I don't see anything, clarence. that's the whole point. whaddya mean? the ship is invisible, you numbskull. well how was I supposed to know? you arrived here on it, jerry. remember? yeah, a long time ago, man! I see. you forgot. well not everybody can be as perfect as you, clarence! don't get your tentacles in a bunch. keep looking. how? you said it's invisible. remember those glasses I gave you? the ones you aren't wearing? um, these? put them on. then it won't be invisible to you, get it? got it. hey, I see something! yeah? don't tell me: the ship is disguised as a red '61 Cadillac!? how cool! you idiot. those are humans. damn. that is a shame. tell me about it.