A list of all the previously listed thoughts, finds it's new home!

125_07.29.2009
I may not know much, but I know the difference between chicken shit and chicken salad. - Lyndon B Johnson

124_07.28.2009
A good novel tells us the truth about it's hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author. - G. K. Chesterton

123_07.27.2009
Compatible: Your money fits in the salesperson's wallet. - Rod Carty

122_07.26.2009
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. - Mark Twain

121_07.25.2009
I always wait for the Times each morning. I look at the obituary column and if I’m not in it, I go to work. - A. E. Matthews

120_07.24.2009
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. - Paul Beatty

119_07.23.2009
In politics, if you want anything said ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

118_07.22.2009
Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. - Dale Carnegie

117_07.21.2009
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer. - Douglas Adams

116_07.20.2009
The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. - George Deukmejian

115_07.19.2009
Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And recovery is when Jimmy Carter loses his. - Ronald Reagan

114_07.18.2009
I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away. - Phyllis Diller

113_07.17.2009
And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said he would have to wait until Thursday to be connected. - Spike Milligan

112_07.16.2009
I only go to work on days that don't end in a 'y'. - Robert Paul

111_07.15.2009
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

110_07.14.2009
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. - Dean Martin

109_07.13.2009
When I can't sleep, I read a book by Steve Allen. - Oscar Levant

108_07.12.2009
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice. - Tommy Cooper

107_07.11.2009
Nobody believes the official spokesman, but everybody trusts an unidentified source. - Ron Nesen

106_07.10.2009
A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theatre admission and the babysitter were worth it. - Alfred Hitchcock

105_07.09.2009
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. - Phyllis Diller

104_07.08.2009
On cable TV they have a weather channel - 24 hours of weather. We had something like that where I grew up. We called it a window. - Dan Spencer

103_07.07.2009
When people ask me if I have any spare change, I tell them I have it at home in my spare wallet. - Nick Arnette

102_07.06.2009
NBC - no body cares. - Jay Leno

101_07.05.2009
I saw a notice that said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started. - Brendan Behan

100_07.04.2009
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. - Albert Einstein

099_07.03.2009
My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference. - Harry S. Truman (circa 1962)

098_07.02.2009
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. - Mark Twain

097_07.01.2009
People say that age is just a state of mind. I say it's more about the state of your body. - Geoffrey Parfitt

096_06.30.2009
So I went to the dentist. He said "Say Aaah." I said "Why?" He said "My dog's died." - Tim Vine

095_06.29.2009
My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he got thrown out of the the fire brigade. - Harry Hill

094_06.28.2009
A guy at work went in for a competition and won a trip to China. He's out there now...trying to win a trip back! - Jerry Dennis

093_06.27.2009
I always advise people never to give advice. - P. G. Wodehouse

092_06.26.2009
If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S. Truman

091_06.25.2009
It's better to have loved and lost than to do forty pounds of laundry a week. - Laurence J Peter

090_06.24.2009
There are only two kinds of men - the dead and the deadly. - Helen Rowland

089_06.23.2009
When an actor marries an actress they both fight for the mirror. - Burt Reynolds

088_06.22.2009
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two... - Sir Norman Wisdom

087_06.21.2009
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. - Will Rogers

086_06.20.2009
A day without laughter is a day wasted. - Charlie Chaplin

085_06.19.2009
The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children. - Clarence Darrow

084_06.18.2009
I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. - Jerome K Jerome

083_06.17.2009
Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive? - Roseanne Barr

082_06.16.2009
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. - Lily Tomlin

081_06.15.2009
The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work. - Robert Frost

080_06.14.2009
Doing nothing is very hard to do...you never know when you're finished. - Leslie Nielsen

079_06.13.2009
It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

078_06.12.2009
Absence -- that common cure of love. - Miguel De Cervantes

077_06.11.2009
I was on a game show. When I lost, they gave me a lovely parting gift. It was a comb. - Scott Roeben

076_06.10.2009
I ain't saying the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance...she leaned over and pushed me. - Anonymous

075_06.09.2009
Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry. - Bill Cosby

074_06.08.2009
If it's sent by ship then it's a cargo, if it's sent by road then it's a shipment. - Dave Allen

073_06.07.2009
I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow. - Billy Connolly

072_06.06.2009
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me. - Emo Philips

071_06.05.2009
The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved. - Victor Hugo

070_06.04.2009
Good pictures are the result of long study rather than chance. - Edward S. Curtis

069_06.03.2009
A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway. - Fr Jerome Cummings

068_06.02.2009
To be prepared is half the victory. - Miguel De Cervantes

067_06.01.2009
Plan your work for today and every day, then work your plan. - Norman Vincent Peale

066_05.31.2009
Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go. - William Feather

065_05.30.2009
One person with a belief is equal to ninety-nine who have only interests. - John Stuart Mill

064_05.29.2009
Failing to plan is planning to fail. - Effie Jones

063_05.28.2009
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman. - Homer Simpson

062_05.27.2009
Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer. - Ed Cunningham

061_05.26.2009
Laugh at yourself first, before anyone else can. - Elsa Maxwell

060_05.25.2009
Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all. - Sam Ewig

059_05.24.2009
Speak when you're angry, and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret. - Lawrence J Peter

058_05.23.2009
We are not in a position in which we have nothing to work with. We already have capacities, talents, direction, missions, callings. - Abraham Maslow

057_05.22.2009
You must either modify your dreams or magnify your skills. - Jim Rohn

056_05.21.2009
You will never find time for anything. If you want the time, you must make it. - Charles Buxton

055_05.20.2009
It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something. - Franklin D Roosevelt

054_05.19.2009
Priorities lead to prosperity. - Michelle Singletary

053_05.18.2009
Insurance is like marriage. You pay, pay, pay, and you never get anything back. - Al Bundy

052_05.17.2009
If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives.

051_05.16.2009
Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement.

050_05.15.2009
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

049_05.14.2009
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?

048_05.13.2009
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.

047_05.12.2009
There are three sides of an arguement -- your side, my side and the right side.

046_05.11.2009
He who laughs last didn't get it.

045_05.10.2009
Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

044_05.09.2009
The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

043_05.08.2009
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

042_05.07.2009
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

041_05.06.2009
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. - Homer Simpson

040_05.05.2009
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch

039_05.04.2009
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

038_05.03.2009
I have nothing to declare except my genius. - Oscar Wilde

037_05.02.2009
Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing. - Mother Teresa

036_05.01.2009
A friend is someone who's there when he needs you. - Anon

035_04.30.2009
A Lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth. - Patrick Murray

034_04.29.2009
Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

033_04.28.2009
I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early. - Charles Lamb

032_04.27.2009
If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough. - Mario Andretti

031_04.26.2009
When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

030_04.25.2009
A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on. - Samuel Goldwyn

029_04.24.2009
A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others. - Ayn Rand

028_04.23.2009
Committee is a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours. - M. Berle

027_04.22.2009
Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

026_04.21.2009
I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted. - George Best

025_04.20.2009
I never think of the future - it comes soon enough. - Albert Einstein

024_04.19.2009
There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you. - David Burns

023_04.18.2009
Life's a voyage that's homeward bound. - Herman Melville

022_04.17.2009
No man was ever wise by chance. - Seneca

021_04.16.2009
In the hopes of reaching the moon men fail to see the flowers that blossom at their feet. - Albert Schweitzer

020_04.15.2009
When I want to read a novel, I write one. - Benjamin Disraeli

019_04.14.2009
Happiness is where we find it, but rarely where we seek it. - J. Petit Senn

018_04.13.2009
As I grow to understand life less and less, I learn to love it more and more. - Jules Renard

017_04.12.2009
Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. - Thomas Jefferson

016_04.11.2009
I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure...
which is: Try to please everybody.
- Herbert Bayard Swope

015_04.10.2009
Let thy words be few. - Ecclesiastes 5:2 from Words of Wisdom

014_04.09.2009
The power of imagination makes us infinite. - John Muir

013_04.08.2009
Every artist was first an amateur. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

012_04.07.2009
If you do not hope, you will not find what is beyond your hopes. - St. Clement of Alexandra

011_04.06.2009
Creativity is to think more efficiently. - Pierre Reverdy

010_04.05.2009
Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

009_04.04.2009
We are still master of our fate. We are still captains of our soul. - Winston Churchill

008_04.03.2009
The best way out, is always through. - Robert Frost

008_04.02.2009
He who angers you conquers you. - Elizabeth Kenny

007_04.01.2009
There is no such thing as a long piece of work, except one that you dare not start. - Charles Baudelaire

006_03.31.2009
It's always too soon to quit. - Norman Vincent Peale

005_03.30.2009
The furture depends on what we do in the present. - Mahatma Gandhi (M.K. Gandhi)

004_03.29.2009
Thoughts lead on to purposes; purposes go forth in action; actions form habits; habits decide character; and character fixes our destiny. - Tyron Edwards

003_03.28.2009
Minds are like parachutes - they only function when open. - Thomas Devar

002_03.27.2009
If we wait for the moment when everything, absolutely everything is ready, we shall never begin. - Ivan Turgenev

001_03.26.2009
Never underestimate the power of a . (dot)!
Every powerful statement has to end before it!

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