I feel rather like Garrison Keiler...right spelling for his surname...can't remember...when he'd begin his weekly radio programme with the introduction...'It Has Been a Quiet Week in my Town' and then follow with a story about some alarming happening which was anything but quiet...
Perhaps our most alarming news is Jamie's new puppy. That takes precedence over Himselfs bladder infection and the new shed...
Because Wendy bought Jamie a puppy out of a man's car boot and paid him vast amounts of money for it...and it's a pedigree Jack Russell and there ain't no such thing...and it is quite the most endearing little creature who has been named Tilly. But, Wendy won't have it in the house 'cos it pees on the floor so Jamie is desperate to have the caravan so he can have it in there with him and the horses are in the front garden now churning up the land like there's no tomorrow and quite how the caravan will get onto their land heaven only knows...
And Himself went to the Doctor and has a course of antibiotics and painkillers because it wasn't a vertigo attack after all but a severe bladder infection and it might be his prostate...but he's already feeling much better so maybe it'll clear up on its own...
Reuben was chatting to an old man in the street who offered him a house for sale then he put the wrong pin number into the bank machine and now it won't let him have any money to pay Neil so he's having to use T's on the promise he'll pay her back as soon as they get home...and when we went to see about the shed I thought it very odd that Neil didn't recognise me at all and looked totally blank and it wasn't Neil but his twin brother Eamonn...who eventually said I wanted his brother not him...
When we were at Wendy's yesterday evening Nancy brought a scruffy and mud covered puppy into the house and Wendy shrieked and the children swooped on it and I thought it looked vaguely familiar...they shut it in the horsebox while I had a think...it belongs to a very nice man who farms some distance away...so I 'phoned him and he was thrilled to bits the pup was found and came out to pick it up and I told him they're all quite mad next door but one...and he rolled his eyes and said a bad word which I won't repeat here but laughed as well...
We're picking Jack and Alex up after lunch on Saturday to take them to the Cave of the Cat...Reuben's going inside the cave with them...T and I will stay up top though to watch out for the herd of flying pigs emerging...we can duck if they do but what'd we do if The Morrigan comes out in a rage I'm none too sure...run probably.
Then Kitty came up with Brian's 'phone no 'cos I'd rung her 'cos I couldn't find it at first and she sort of dribbled while talking about Brian 'cos he's awful good-looking and all the ladies of a certain age in the locality lust after him even if he is married with grown-up children...it was Brian's dog who strayed in...forgot to tell you that.
Neil and Alan are here hammering and banging...Himself has gone down to see Christy and Henry and T and Reuben have gone to town to get some money from the bank and do a bit of shopping...which is why I'm writing this really quickly before they all come back and chaos descends once more...
If I don't get to your pages it's not 'cos I don't care it's 'cos Reuben is talking to me about something or other and my minds more befuddled than usual...