Himself has taken to his bed with an upset tummy...will he drink plenty of fluids...will he quit behaving as though he's on his last legs...and will he ever realise I'm perfectly capable of feeding the donkeys and lighting the range...not only do I know how to but I don't need to be told...and the answer to the above is ...no.
Only last evening I was describing what happens to your inside bits if you don't drink enough, in relation to an elderly lady who was in the bed next to me in the hospital...Himself nods wisely and declares dehydration is easily avoidable...then he's sick several times in the night and practically bites my head off when I tell him to drink...
Suggest some Kaolin to settle his stomach and you'd think I'd recommended a spoonful of arsenic...and he groans...quietly. Which is actually far more annoying than groaning really loudly...
Then he decides he will drink after all...but only 7-UP...and we don't have any. So he drags himself from his sick bed and starts the car...will you come with me he says and go into the shop...so I do. He backs out of our drive straight into the stone wall...then the car lurches forwards and runs over a couple of the rocks we have edging our bit from the road...will you have a cup of tea instead of 7-Up I ask...but he's already half way down our road and when he meets the staggered cross-roads simply drives straight over them...twice I had to remind him about the bends...and which side of the road to drive on...
We reach the edge of town where there is a small grocery store and I make him stop there while I dash in and load the counter with lemon barley and 7-UP and Maureen asks if everything alright and I tell her about Himself and she makes the immediate diagnosis that he has a dose...
One of Tina's twins was walking past with her two babies and she stopped and asked were we well and I told her about Himself and she said wisely...he has a dose.
We lurched back home, with me hanging on for grim death, and when we finally made it as far as the gate I let rip...
Then I left him to it and shut myself in my new shed and played for a while.
Since one o'clock, when we returned from the drive into hell, he's drunk half a small glass of 7-UP .