Confessions of a nail biting smoker
I am an addict, I am a nicotine addict and a nail biting addict. Right now I have my addictions under some control, in as much as I don't smoke and for me I can't bite my nails due to the fact that I wear braces. This is the first time since I was a small child except for a brief time that I have fingernails. And I have smoked off and on since I was a teen, not a good track record. When I decided to quit smoking again this time, having fallen off the wagon after many years of being a non smoker I approached it with the admission that I was a nicotine addict, and that if I wanted to finally stop this habit I would deal with it as a true person with an addiction. I went to the professionals at the employee assistance program at work, who I knew from doing work for them and asked to be counseled for my smoking. I joined an on-line smoking anonymous group and spoke to an addiction counselor about what drove me to smoke and what feelings and actions accompanied my smoking. I am working on year two of being "smober" and I am happy with this state, it works for me. I am saving money and feeling better in some respects. I don't preach to others and do my best to come off as a reformed addict. My decision is for me and me alone, I would talk if asked about it, even here I am just relating an aspect of my life. Does this fuel anything in my life, not sure though it as stated before it informs who I am and how I see the world.
Oh by the way, I found a cool little web site called swap-bot.com which helps like minded creative people set up swap projects for trading music or art or various things that make creative people happy. I am thinking about joining to find people who would like to receive my postcards. Though this is for people who want to swap things, whereas I am really looking to push my work outwards. I will mull it over. As I write this, the HBO show "In Treatment" is going on, I find it a bit annoying the shrink is pushy and a bit obnoxious to me the writing is too "deep" and puhlease, isn't there anywhere that shouldn't be exploited for entertainment. Oh that sounds sanctimonious, oh well I guess I just don't like the show.
ta ta for now