Suppressing to Suit Our Self
If I told you a memory, would you believe that it was real or fictional? If I said that I felt unhappy and did not understand why, would you consider my feelings to be incapable of its entirety to be on the surface or hidden deep within my conscious? Psychosomatic ailments are pushing the body to reveal something that the anxiety has tied around its finger. The matters that interrupt your daily concepts and/or thoughts tend to be affected by the emotional display of your agreement or disagreement with the situation. How do we shut off something that we are completely distraught or afraid of? When we attempt to challenge these emotions, we are often set aside of the real psychological root to our disturbance. So what do we tend to do?
We tend to overeat, we wake up early morning with anxiety, we ignore others when they start scratching the surfaces, we indulge to complete impulsion, we bind ourselves to distractions such as gambling, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, lying, stealing, distancing from those close, appearing late everywhere with everything, and even sleeping more than necessary. So suppression, this little box of anecdote, keeps you temporarily protected while you go through your life with complete false joy and happiness. If you are catching yourself during the day watching the clock, you do not only want to leave but there is something on your mind that you do not want to sit still and think about. So you suppress it until you think you're safe to move into another environment.
Why do we feel the need to suppress? Why is our body atomically disruptive in an evolutionary way for fight or flight, repress or process? I constantly find myself thinking a lot about suppression that mimics repression. For me, repression is only a minor state of holding back whether your emotions, fears, thoughts, and/or addictions. Suppression I feel is a longer process that continuously be the act of constantly burying things within which may not ever resurface until some unsuspected day. I truly think that when we grow up and hold our parent(s) hand, we are embracing this act of acknowledgment and storing memories to help us develop healthy and positive process of being needed. Suppression tends to lack need of one being accepted, approved, and acknowledge. Basically we want to be accepted, we want to be a part of something and we need others to fulfill this inner desire for us. If we are not nourished by it, we feel that we must cling to other factors in our life that starts the switch of suppression to begin turning within our body and mind. Approved is like the final stepped to achieving someone's interest or someone's devotion whether spiritually, emotionally, socially, psychologically, and biologically. Acknowledged is what the mind needs to process how he/she is looked upon to the self from the general environments or one's actions.
Instead of taking our time to develop the self and learn about the self, we are taught with different roles and experiences that shape the way we face our suppression. So if it does not go as planned or as answered, we suppressed it. If the norms say you are abnormal, why not suppressed it to make you less human and lack your identity? Sometimes suppression can be an automatic defense mechanism to protect you from going over and instead of remaining on that balance pole. You're anxious because you're thinking about things that affect you negatively. You think and reflect more on your emotions that makes you uncomfortable. So your mind and body tells you to flight because it does not like the way both are not agreeing with one another-when your psychological consciousness makes you aware this is your duty to act upon and find support to your stressors. Imagine that-a suppression to be your greatest toil and stressor is rather too much to bear and swallow. So you do the inevitable, you go and suppress. You find hobbies to divert your mind of those very things that come up to the surface. Why keep pressing them down when obvious they need to be up on the surface floating to be emptied out through a resolution?
Resolutions to your Suppressions
I think there are quick manages to your suppressions, but never quick fixes. Suppression is a process that takes time for you to release everything that you keep buried on a day-to-day basis.
Things to try according to Keisha:
1) Start journaling about what you are going through whether good or bad.
2) Develop a positive hobby like taking long walks to give you fresh air and hopefully enough space to allow more of suppressed thoughts to come forth.
3) Be yourself. This is very important. The more you fake yourself to the world, the less you will feel able to be yourself alone. You're only suppressing yourself to the general public and even more so when you're alone because you're got all these different aspects burning inside of you.
4) Take your time with your life. Don't be in an extreme hurry to try to fix yourself and/or feel like you're imperfect. Simply relax. Find a friend to speak with and just laugh about the ridiculous occurrences in your life. Believe it or not-EVERYONE GOES THROUGH THEM.
5) Self-Identification. Know yourself. If you do not know after reading this, you should spend time getting to know yourself. It is like experimenting without any type of methods and instruments. You just introduce you to you. Then you take charge of your Self.
6) If all of these suggestions do not, you should seek someone like me. A therapist who will be there to support and be open with you. Not someone who will try to change you but assist you while you take your own lead in the room.
I will continue to think about suppression and perhaps construct a Chapter 2 of suppression. I am always curious about why we are naturally proned to suppress things and sometimes have this suppression on our conscious. Like we are aware when we hate our boss but we do nothing about it. We do not engage in talk with our boss about how we may need a little time. Of course our boss may not want to hear it and think it is entirely bullcrap. Process is the key. Does not have to be today, tomorrow, or a month for now. If you do not work on dealing with your issues, your suppression may increase you to develop another you who would even decide to hate even more the old you. When both are you in the first place, one does not need another identity or addiction to support their troubles. It is often easy said than done. These are my thoughts and I do not expect those who are reading to live this especially if you feel you have no suppression and/or worries floating about.
I hate to break it to you that denial is also a part of suppression. It is my personal opinion. When you do not acknowledge the truth but undergo a sense of denial, you give way for suppression to feed like a cycle on the root-denial-subconscious-suppression.
Disclaimer: I am merely introducing conversation and analytical views about this automatic and learned defense mechanism. These are my words without any research just personal reflection through critical implications about life and choices of our actions.
-Keisha S. Marshall
P.S. This is old writing of mines, and I do not intend to offend any who is reading this. It is pure self-theoretical thinking. ;)