HyperBob's blog

So I opened up an old case that belonged to my father and randomly threw photographs on the table. There were a few of my father and mother and lots of my grandfather and his brothers and their wives, At the end there was a few photos of me as a baby. Some many generations needed to have gone before me for me to come into existence. Men and women committing themselves to one another to bring up their offspring, It is a miracle really that I exist or that the line continues though my children and grandchildren.

What of those families that cease to exist. That just disappear. A war. a pestilance, a shipwreck, a train crash, a lifestyle, wipes away all traces of a families existance, so that not even a memory remains

The two countries in the world that love... REALLY REALLY love the tango are Finland and Argentina. The tradition has it that the musicians when playing the tango should be blindfolded. Perhaps this is to help them concentrate and not be distracted y the antics of the dancers on the dancefloor

Who can forget the El Tango de Roxanne from the movie Moulin Rouge

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysBMt-...

Or that special twist where Al Pacino plays a blind soldier who takes to the dancefloor with an awestruck young woman in the movie "Scent of a woman"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBHhSV...

And prepare to have you flab gasted by antonio

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEwZIu...

I was watching a video called Help Me by Johnny Cash and at the beginning a prisoner talks about the excitement of Johnny Cash coming to play a concert at the prison. Watch the video just to listen to the prisoner talk before the song and then after it.. ya see?

He tells the story of how Johnny Cash threw some of his harmonicas out into the crowd and he caught one. Later he traded the harmonica for a bag of M&M's. He said it was the worst deal he had every made in his life. I thought it was a great story so I wrote a song about it.

Is there anything in you life that you regretted having to part with, and are you still consumed with remorse?

So even though Obama headed across to Denmark his statesmanship was not sufficient to land the Olympics for Chicago. In the song "Bad Bad Leroy Brown" it was said that the southside of Chicago was the badest part of town. This is patently wrong because as everybody knows it is the eastside of major cities that usually has the bad reputation... the east end of London for example. Whereas the west end on London is for the rich and famous. Even here in Finland the area called Westend is where the most affluent people live.

It is interesting to speculate why certain areas of a city have a bad reputations and you wouldn't want to live there. I know nothing about Chicago only that the gangster Al Capone had his operations there, and perhaps they were on the southside.

The first time I heard this song it was by Ry Cooder, and more recently Bruce Springsteen has done his own version of it but written his own lyrics to reflect the tragedy of the floods in New Orleans, but the original was done by Blind Albert Reed in 1929.

The song that Reed wrote had a ton of verses and I have selected a few of them to sing. What is evident is that the concerns people had back in the 20's are exactly the same as we have today ( Financial crises. food prices, education, misuse of power, health )

Everything changes but everything stays the same... and the poor, thank God, will always have music and dance

Lyrics

There was once a time when everything was cheap
But now prices almost puts a man to sleep
When we pay our grocery bill
We just feel like making our will
Tell me how can a poor man stand such times and live

I remember when dry goods were cheap as dirt
We could take two bits and buy a dandy shirt
Now we pay three bucks or more
Maybe get a shirt that another man wore
Tell me how can a poor man stand such times and live

Oh the schools we have today ain't worth a cent
But they see to it that every child is sent
If we don't send everyday
We have a heavy fine to pay
Tell me how can a poor man stand such times and live

Most our preachers preach for gold and not for souls
That's what keeps a poor man always in a hole
We can hardly get our breath
Taxed and schooled and preached to death
Tell me how can a poor man stand such times and live

Oh it's time for every man to be awake
We pay fifty cents a pound when we ask for steak
When we get our package home
A little wad of paper with gristle and a bone
Tell me how can a poor man stand such times and live

Well the doctor comes around with a face all bright
And he says in a little while you'll be all right
All he gives is a humbug pill
A dose of dope and a great big bill
Tell me how can a poor man stand such times and live

The pictures that go along with this old proclaimers song are from women working in a aircraft factory during war time. So many beautiful women doing tasks that traditionally might be the sole domain of men.

Wars change society in so many ways, Back in the day, women moving out of the home and into the factory looks so revolutionary, When you look at these pictures are you able to tell if the women are from Russia or from America.

Anyhoo the song is about getting lucky with a girl, and the feeling you get when someone who you think is unobtainable suddenly becomes accessible.

It is about being lucky in love. We all need a bit of that sometimes

Light

Dark

So the grandkids are visiting Finland and Noa become very interested in the Ukulele. So much so that we had to bannish him to the balcony so he could practise chord changes.

He found out that there was another competition on Ukulele Underground called Coffee Coffee Contest and wanted to enter it, and decided that he would write an original song and perform it. There's confidence for you. His sister Elli also became enthusiastic and wanted to be backup singers (plural)

After three days (or according to Elli) four he had his song ready and we recorded it and entered it in the competition. I thought the strum he developed for the song was fantastic, and I thought they both were brilliant at performing their song... but then I would since I am their grandfather.

The thing I like about Ukuklele Underground is that rank and file members can run and organise contests. Sometimes the prizes are T-shirts or tuners or something simple but the latest contest is for a gold tone banjolele and it is called

Shake your soul

I have put in a couple of soul classics from the 60's. Bring it on home to me by Sam Cooke that man had a magical voice.

and the Otis redding song Try a little tenderness which was written in 1933 by Woods, Campbell and Connelly. This song has wonderful and mysterious chords and when you hit them they make you smile.

The song Elephant town is developing into a meme on youtube. There is a campaign afoot to get every Ukulele player on Ukukele underground to do a cover version of this song. It is quite amazing that regardless of singing ability or playing skills many people are covering this song.

And then again some of the most skillful Uke players in the Ukulele underground are also covering the song. I think it gives a sense of community when from the smallest to the greatest everbody sings the same some, and where if you perform really badly then the better performance you have given

The original song was by a 3 year old girl called Tia and her video has been viewed over 12,000 times. To date there has been elephant town tutorials, blistering blues versions, dream like surreal versions, free jazz versions, techno mix. My Finnish tango version is perhaps the first foreign language version.

Here is a link to get your fill of Elephant town versions

Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
What a promise divine - what a sugary treat.
Pudding and pies - beans and peas
Buy anything - just eat what you please
Salt and ice-cream - belly fat pork
There is no difference - between butter or Stork.
Now there is a promise - you just can't beat.
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
Triple quarter pounder -where does it stop
Eat what you like - if it's got lettuce on top
Blubber and skin - and fast frozen meat
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
The more you eat - the more weight you loose
Buy what you want - no need to choose
Mix yoghut and garlic - they'll go down a treat
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
Make your body - a fat burning machine!
Drink olive oil - it's exceptionally clean
Dress your salad - with hard skin from your feet
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
You don't need to fast - you don't need to pray
Just double your intake of food everyday.
No charts to offend - no weightwatchers to cheat
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
Flatten your stomach - get rid of the flab
Eat oysters and whelks - and fine Cromer crab
Just keep on eating - never admit to defeat
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
Just be amazed - watch the pounds disappear
For breakfast drink - a six pack of beer
Just don't mix protein - along with your wheat
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!
Speed eat your food - and make your pulse race.
Use lots of energy - getting food to your face.
Your heart must pound - with a rhythmical beat
Negative calories - lose weight while you eat!"

So here is the challenge try this Forking with hyperbob. If you are able to replicate this feat then post a video response.

OK? Now let's see you fork off

I expect there are millions of books written about love. We read them and try to put them into practice only to find out that the advice we have been given does not work for us. But we really truly want to believe that somewhere clear and precise instructions have been written down and that if we follow them precisely we will experiance what it means to love and be loved.

You don't get nothing for free,
'less of course you steal it,
at least that's what the people say.
The sad irony of Love is
how so seldom you feel it,
yet it's all you dream about, night and day.

Kenny and the Captains are from Australia and they play melodica. Most of their songs are covers and they last at a maximum just over one minute. This is not because they believe their audiences have the attention span of a gnat, but rather they are able to condense all the major elements of a pop song into a one minute thrash, or in the case of melodicas a one minute blow.

Their real ambition is to become so minimalistic that they will be able to play just one note that will encompass all of the pop songs ever written, and thus render youtube obsolete. They have found the perfect vehicle for this venture and their magnum opus will be the one note samba.

I can hardly wait to hear that one note which will last for no more than half a second. It will be awesome.

But in the meantime here is something else that is completly awesome the marrige of R&B and Hula-Hula.

P.S Oh and the competition was to play a novelty song outside on the Ukulele with a plastic fork on display. I did not win becasue my Captain Kenny mask was a failure.

Got anew Ukulele. It is a Skylark brand from China and it was cheap only cost £35 but when it came it was strung with what looked like fishing line. All of the strings were the same diameter, and it proved impossible to tune. I was fearful that the bridge would pop off when I tightened up the machine heads.

I changed the strings to a set of Aquila nylgut and the tone and sustain has improved, but it is still not as loud as my Ohana which is a much smaller instrument. Could be that the Skylark is made out of laminate and not solid wood like the Ohana.

The next thing to try is to get a new saddle perhaps made out TUSQ that is said to improve the vibrations to the soundboard, anyway I tried a performace of an old Van Morrison classic "Have I told you lately" and also an old Eric Bogle song Belle o' Broughton

Miru Kim is an urban explorer. She goes into dark tunnels and delapidated buildings and photographs the decay. It is not enough to record the abandonment and ruin she always places herself in the photo. Her naked self.

We have all come across photographs of a beautiful woman posing in an abandoned building, be it an old hospital, and insane asylum, unused train tunnels or the decrepit industrial wasteland, and thought about the fact that man builds so many impressive structures and then for some reason they become abandoned, and over a period of time seem to be taken over by nature.

Whole cities in the amazon are engulfed by the jungle, sugar factories no longer economical stand forlorn, with pipes and tubes still in place but totally dysfunctional.

Ms Kim places her frail thin naked body in the midst of these structures as a testament to man's ingenuity to build and be creative, and at the same time shows the other side of his nature which allows neglect and decay.

Why is it that Mr Warren Buffet is one of the richest men in the world, well basically it is because he plays the Ukulele. In this video he has some interesting personal anecdotes about his relationship with the Ukulele, and even suggests that if the Obama stimulation package does not work then at some point the economic welfare of the world will be saved by the Ukulele.

It should come as no surprise that China is one of the biggest producers of Ukukleles in the world and when we look at their economy it is still steaming ahead at 8% per anum. There has to be a relationship between Ukuleles and personal and economic well being. Mr Buffet has spoken... go figure.

Get yourself a Chinese Ohana Ukulele today. It will revolutionise your life, and you will be contributing to the world economic recovery.