I was in the store the other night, waiting in line at the "express" lane, but it was taking a little while. This being a suburban type of area, I mostly just stared into space while waiting. The point is, I was in a place not infested by criminals and gangsters, so I did not feel the need to avoid eye contact with people. I briefly glanced at a young couple behind me in line, only to hear the guy drop the F-bomb out loud, in public, in front of lots of people. He said something like "you got some kind of a fucking problem! ...... (some mumbling) ...... looking at my girlfriend". I simply said out loud that I had no idea what he's talking about. I've never been good at making witty comebacks, but upon hearing his words and tone, I was preparing myself for his attack. I wanted the crowd around us to see that I was calm and rational and he was an enraged, paranoid jackass gunning for the Darwin award.

I thought for a second, and realized he's not big, so maybe he's some kind of boxer, cage fighter, etc. so I needed whatever I could find that can do the most damage in the least time. I took a heavy can after the cashier had scanned it and placed it within reach at the top of my cart. I know that the one left standing at the end of most fights is usually the one who delivers the first effective strike, so I did not want to be taken by surprise. Nothing ever happened. Thankfully, the attack never came, but it was one of the most tense and awkward moments. Afer the verbal exchange, I made it a point to watch him from the corner of my eye, while very slowly loading my stuff onto the conveyeur belt and casually chatting with the cashier (don't think she heard his F bomb). I knew that being in a hurry would show tension and fear, so I intentionally went slow.

When finished, I very slowly walked out to my car, but then very quickly loaded it up. They were nowhere in sight. I had a rental anyway, so I drove around and noticed them getting into a yellow mustang with decals on the back window. I just wanted another mental note to keep, so I'll remember it if I am ever called as a witness or happen to see this guy on the 6 o'clock news. Thankfully, the night ended peacefully for me, as the other 10,000+ nights of my life have. Hopefully, this young jackass will meet someone just like himself, and the world will become a better place because there will be one less of them. As for the stupid girl that was with him, she probably interprets his chip on the shoulder as love. If she does not leave him after such public displays of jackass behavior, then she certainly deserves him.