I got woke up when folks came to bed after I had fallen asleep and I've been up ever since........I like the night time hours anyway........everything is quiet and I feel like I get to share secrets with the universe.......then I sleep when everyone else is busy......sometimes anyway.......

I've had this old high school buddy thinking of pursuing me........I asked the Lord to help me discourage this fellow because he kind of appeals to me and I don't want temptation in my life......so tonight when he started messaging me, I let him know I'm crazy. He doesn't like complicated and I let him know I'm way too complicated for him......I love my husband and it's a big bonus that he loves me and isn't frightened of me.......he understands my issues.......but then again, his best friend was schizophrenic.....I'm merely schizo-affective........but it doesn't get me out of doing the dishes :(

I'm enjoying this warmer weather........I just wish my oldest girl wasn't sick.......yesterday we opened the windows and let the house air out.......that was awesome. I like to listen to the birds sing anyway.......even though one of them is a total liar......kept telling me I was purty purty..........hmmm.........

This business of FEMA buying up all those bullets.......why in the hell cant I get excited or at least concerned about it? The news on the old home front keeps getting worse all the time as far as our rights being taken away and more and more limited, talk of FEMA camps.......them buying bullets enough to fight a long war.......and I can't get the least little bit concerned.......what the hell is wrong with me? Don't get me wrong, I expect the proverbial shit to hit the fan eventually. I just think I'm gonna be raptured when it does.

Even if I'm not here though, I think my sister, my brother and my mom are going to be here and they will have to deal with it........two of those three say they are saved. But I doubt it on both counts because of the way they treat people.......saying something doesn't make it true.......you have to SHOW me something......I don't automatically believe everything I hear.......if I did, I'd be more jacked up than I already am. I should be concerned that they are going to have it to deal with.......but somehow I'm not.

I guess repeated offenses after awhile make you bitter or numb........I think I'm numb. Comfortably numb........anyway, I better try to get some sleep before everyone gets up because if I don't.......chances are I wont be able too later........but I sure would rather sleep during the day if I had my druthers........laters.