Something Jenny wrote made me think about the things we used to do when we were younger that now seem like such hard work. When I was younger my partner and I used to camp, a lot. We had quite a large tent because we had our baby with us. When the baby was just a few weeks old, we went away with the tent and camped down in Cornwall. Because I’d had my first child in my 30’s, the midwife used to visit every day. She meant well, however visiting every day felt very intrusive. Family and friends popped in too with no notice, and we decided to ‘escape’ for a few days. I never liked the smell of Milton’s fluid – bottle steriliser, and was having trouble feeding the ‘natural’ way so our baby was mostly on the bottle. Can you imagine; sterilising babies bottles in a pan of boiling water on a little camp stove? Somehow we managed it and our baby was never poorly so I must have done it right. I’ve ‘done my time’ camping, and as I said on Tori’s page, I’m now too old to camp; that’s my story and I’m sticking to it ;)

When our son was around 10 years old, my partner and I split up. It was partly 9/11 that did it, but also going to University. To explain a little; I was deeply upset watching the planes crash into the buildings and although I didn’t know anyone personally involved or affected, it affected me deeply. Something my partner said at the time started me thinking that he really wasn’t a nice man. Going to university opened my eyes too. People in the class, and the lecturers were nice to me. No-one shouted at me though one lecturer did tell me off and almost made me cry in class. People seemed to genuinely like me and were interested in my opinions; a far cry from my home life. I didn’t like the way my partner (we never married) spoke to me, or our son; he was a bit of a bully, and when a friend offered to (financially) help me leave him, I went for it. That sounds very blasé, however it was more than that but this isn’t the time or place... At the time I was studying full time for my degree and in to my second year, and decided that I wanted to rejoin the workforce, so I worked 15 hours a week which was the legal maximum that you can work whilst being a full time student. It was hard going, doing all that and being a single parent family and I’d often be awake at some unspeakable hour writing up an essay or making notes. Looking back, I genuinely don’t know how I did it. Once I obtained my degree I was made a permanent member of staff, though still only part time, term time only. I loved the hours, and the long holidays, but every pay day was a painful reminder that I needed more hours. Now I work full time, and 18 months on, I still find it hard going. Roll on retirement! Lol

We do what we need to or have to, just to survive. I wouldn’t say that I’m happy now, but I am content knowing that life has been much worse. I have family, friends, and a job that pays the bills and importantly, space to just be me.

Sorry if I’ve missed a few blogs but I’ve had some computer problems here. My old PC is having graphics card problems. My old laptop only works when it feels like recharging due to a hardware problem, and my son’s laptop has been playfully displaying the Blue Screen of Death at inopportune moments. I feel a trip to the PC store coming on...

Back to work on Monday. The break has been great!